When I Saw Her Standing There
by FiReAnDRaIn
Summary: Gordo grows apart from Lizzie and Miranda, and finds refuge in someone he's been looking for all of his life. Then with out warning, his life begins to crumble little by little until there is nothing left to hold on to.
1. The Beginning of The End

  
Gah. Who would've thought? We broke up. The infamous three, Lizzie, Gordo, and Miranda have broken up. Well, at least the Gordo part. That was one fucked up day. I turned my entire reason for living around. Maybe I just went totally postal that day, but I let my soulmate slip away; she just walked off and I let her go. How could I do that? Maybe its because my emotions were raw from breaking apart the two best friends I've ever had. She said that was a huge mistake, probably the biggest mistake I've ever made. No, I said. Letting you go was. She didn't hear that. Of course she didn't, she was gone. Gone forever. I didn't even run after her. Damnit, Gordo. Of all the stupid things you've done, I'm sure this one is the stupidest. I don't even know why I left those two in the first place. Maybe if I were a more accepting human being to the inane shallowness of teenaged girls, this would never have happened. But, come on, when you're around these two for your entire lives the little things, idiosyncrasies I think they're called, start getting to you.   
*  
The shreaks. Those were probably what drove me to my insanity. You can't tune them out forever, you know. It's impossible. Yeah yeah, we've known each other forever, and bonds like that never break. Well guess what? I guess I really tested time and clichés with that one, huh? Well nothing lasts forever. Look at the Beatles, and the way of life that was the 60s, need I say more? I sort of felt sorry for it afterward, but it was like nothing happened to them. You know what they did? I think they both decided, in that one brain that they shared that finally, they'd get their chance to sit at the cool table. Oh wow. What a god damned honor. I'm tellin' ya, the standards these days keep rising and rising. It's almost astonishing. Almost. As soon as I saw that I thought, well God, if there really is a God and you decide to show yourself today of all days, strike me dead now, because its not like anyone would miss me. Then I guess I laughed bitterly when nothing happened. Isn't that always the way? When you really need someone, they're never there. Jeez.   
I guess you would like to know how it happened huh? Well, it started out as a normal day, I was at my locker putting a new tape in my camcorder and Lizzie and Miranda were right by my side, obnoxiously swooning over either Danny Kessler or Ethan Craft, I'm not sure which. In fact, I'm sure they're the same people. I was about this close to slamming a book down and just going off, but I kept my cool. I'm cool Gordo. Gordo can keep it cool just like the rest of them. So, instead of going on a total anger rampage, I decided to ask them an ill-fated question.   
"What the hell do you guys see in them? I mean, look at them, they talk the same, walk the same, and look the same. What's the difference? It's like a carbon copy. If there wasn't enough of Ethan, which there most certainly was, they come and stick in a Danny Kessler. Why can't girls go for the quiet, deep guys? Like me."  
"Gordo, no. You're smart, and you're good with a camera and that's about it. Ethan, however, is like a god. Everything that comes out of his mouth is pure music. And Danny, well look at him, he's got so much going for him, I mean, his devastating good looks will take him everywhere in life. I think every girl needs a guy like him!" Miranda said in that squeaky "I'm-trying-to-be-nice-but-it's-just-not-working" type voice. Lizzie however, really made me feel like a million bucks.   
"Yeah Gordo, I mean we've all known each other for forever, and you're really smart, and really great for homework and all, but uh, as far as boyfriend material is concerned, you just don't cut it. Now, if you were as handsome as Ethan or Danny, then maybe I'd give you a chance, but until then, you're still our Gordo." That fake smile plastered all over her face. I shook my head in the trademark Gordo disapproval and walked off with my camera. Who needs them anyway? As long as I have my camera, and I'm observing the twisted habits of 16-year-olds in high school, I'll learn to deal with myself. I'd see them in some stupid class later anyway. I really can't wait until summer. Damn school. Damn shallow girl friends. Whatever.  
  



	2. New Revalations

New Revelations  
  
I didn't sit with them in Science today. Talk about shifts in the Earth's gravitational pull. I thought the entire class was going to have a heart attack. It was like the principal got on the intercom and told everyone the world was ending today. Come on, you guys. I can sit wherever the hell I want, I'm 16 almost 17 I think I know how to make my own decisions. And besides, its not like they were affected in the least. It's like I'm not there anymore. Maybe that's because I'm not, but just seeing them alternate between swooning over Danny or Ethan, or whoever it was that took my spot between them, and complaining about the workload really made me think about what our friendship means to them. I thought it meant the world and more to me, these were two people that I've known since I was a baby, but since seventh grade I've begun to see a change in their attitude, and a drastic change in mine. And now more than ever I'm beginning to realize that I've been taken for granted. I don't mean that much to them because I'm not popular. But I thought that was what we stood for, you know? We don't have to be popular to be happy. I guess that all changed in the seventh grade. It's funny how we never really realize it while its going on, but when we sit down and look back on it, it all becomes so clear. The three of us were three very, very different people. And I guess now is the time for all of this to come out in the open. We're graduating next year, and I don't want us to be fake friends for another year, I don't think they could handle all that lying. Or, maybe I'm just over thinking everything, and it's nothing. But I know that what I'm feeling right now is betrayal, and I need to tell them what I think soon, or else I might go crazy.  
"MR. GORDON!" Mr. Stewart yelled. "I realize its nearing the end of the school year, but could you PLEASE try to pay attention when I'm talking to you?" Damn, I must have been pretty far off if I wasn't paying attention. David Gordon, congratulations, you have reached a new low.  
"Of course, sir. I'll try." I could hear the chuckles surrounding me. Haha, Gordo got in trouble. Now the world really is coming to an end. Imagine the novelty. Only five more minutes of this close to intolerable hell. You can do it Gordo, be strong, and be a man. 5..4..3..2..1.. Finally! Jeezus, I think that was the longest five minutes in the world. Good bye Science, hello lunch.   
**  
All right, it's lunchtime. We all know what that means. Wait, damn! They've beaten me to it. Arg. And I had a whole big speech planned out too. What a way to go. Here I was all prepared and stuff, and then here they come bouncing in like two bubbles with out a clue. Here we go.   
"Hey, Gordo!" They said. In stereo, I'm impressed. Mildly.  
"What's up." Smile Gordo. They won't know what's going on.  
"Oh, uh, well we were just wondering if you were free to do our science paper for us? Since you're so talented with words and all." Lizzie asked. She added a little laugh at the end, but that didn't help the cause. David Gordon was buckling down, standing his ground, and being a man.   
"No, no I can't. Lizzie, I'm tired of being Gordo the back up plan for the two of you. I'm tired of me doing everything for you both when we're JUNIORS, ALMOST FRIGGIN SENIORS in high school. Come on you two, can't you do something for yourselves? I'm tired of being taken for granted." There, I let it out. Let it sink in, so that you can really hit 'em hard with what's coming next.  
"So, what are you saying?" Miranda asked. I swear, if she was any denser, she would be twirling her ponytail around her finger. God in heaven! Was I not perfectly crystal clear?   
"I said NO. What part of that didn't you understand? You girls need to learn how to do things for yourself. I'm not going to be there for you all the time. In fact, as of right now, I'm not there at all. Maybe it would be better for the three of us if we just parted ways as of now. I know I would be a little bit happier than I am now. Maybe. It depends." Way to go, Gordo. Laying down the law. I'm proud of myself. That was probably the only good thing that I did that day. And even my soul mate that I LET FUCKING GO said that it was a mistake. Was it? Was I making a huge mistake dumping the two best friends I've ever known? No, no I'm not. This is the right thing to do. Of course it is. If it weren't, then I wouldn't be doing it. The three of us would still be together and things would be simply fantastic. But they aren't, so yes, Gordo; this is the right thing to do.   
I walked away. Me, David "Gordo" Gordon walked away from the only two people I've ever known. It felt as if a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders. And for the first time in 16 years, I smiled. But of course, like my life story, that happiness will be cut short. Why wouldn't it? It would be the perfect end to a perfectly horrible life. 


	3. My Thoughts

Damn Thoughts  
  
Well, it's been done for five minutes. I wonder if anyone's documented it. I'm sure they have, because they probably think Hell has frozen over, or it's a sure sign that the end is near. And yet I'm plagued by this voice in the back of my mind. What have I done? No, stop. What I just did had to happen. I need my space. That's it, I need my space. Now, if I just keep telling myself that, it should all be okay. Normalcy. Maybe that's what I'm feeling. Finally after all these years of being deprived of it, a sense of normalcy is what I'm feeling. Damn the fool who came up with such a sense. What a load of shit. I'm not feeling a sense of normalcy. I'm feeling deep regret for something that "had to happen." Wow, that's a load of bullshit, too. Damn, Gordo. You are really batting a thousand today! I can't be feeling regret; I've been feeling animosity for the past year, why is this all coming up now? I need to scream. Where's a pillow when you really need one?  
  
Okay, so now that all of that is floating around in that confused head of mine what to do now? Well, dumbass. We eat now. Wow, I'm eating alone, all by myself. No Lizzie or Miranda talking my ear off about absolutely nothing important. Let me turn on my camera and spy on them, just to see if they're feeling anything. All right well, I can't see anything. Maybe it will hit them later. Yeah, right. Oh, oh God. There goes my lunch. No, not...  
"Ethan." Smile Gordo. Be nice.  
"Gor-don! My man! Lizzie told me you guys split up."  
"Well, I guess she told the truth." Sadly. Wait, no. It's not sad. It's good. It's good to be apart. Isn't it?  
"Bummer, man. They're pretty hot." Damnit. He was right. NO GORDO! STOPIT! Fuck! I'm so confused!  
"Uh, yeah okay. Gotta run, catch ya later!" Way to go. Run from the problem. Damnit what a headache this has caused me. I think I'm gonna go hop into my Jeep Wrangler, and speed off into the sunset. Well, maybe just leave school early. It's not like I'll be missed or anything. It'll be me, my thoughts, and the open road; until I get home, that is. Then it will be me, my bed, and my music. What a life you lead, David Gordon. I'm proud to be you, very proud. If only you weren't such a complete jackass sometimes. It's times like these I wish I had someone to talk to.   
**  
All right, so here I am on the open road. I was thinking back, and honestly I couldn't think of one damn bad thing that happened between the three of us that would cause me to do what I just did. Well, I guess I could count that time in seventh grade when I was Gordo, the Garbage King and I was married to Lizzie, the Lawyer who took me for granted both as a friend and a faux-husband. But, as usual, we worked it out. Maybe I'm just scared that this is going to happen after high school, when we're all at different colleges around the US. Is that what this is? Or, maybe it's because I need a change. Yes, that must be it. I need a change. Our relationship was too predictable. I still haven't found what I'm looking for, though. But, we all know what they say; Happiness is not a fish that you can catch. Well, okay, Our Lady Peace said that, but it fit with what I was thinking. This is way more complicated than it needs to be. I can't stand this anymore, I need to just stop over thinking this for a while, and take a nap. A well deserved nap.   
Well, now that naps have become over rated, I'm stuck here at home with nothing to do but think. Damn thinking. That never did me any good. I thought about picking up the phone, but then the shock of reality came back and bit me in the ass. Stupid Gordo, you have no friends, remember? You dumped them not one hour ago! How soon we forget. What am I going to do? I need to talk to someone. But I can't. It's not that simple. What would be simply fantastic is if someone I could relate to, and talk to came to the door and just rid me of all my complex and confusing problems. Lord knows I'm too stupid to handle them. After all, I'm only a 16-year-old boy whose life has just started to crumble. Or so I thought.   
My parents are home. Both of them, at the same time. This can't be a good sign. Damnit! 


	4. The Bench

Chapter 4  
  
So, story of my life is that my parents constantly fight. No big deal, we aren't a family statistic yet, and probably never will be. I've learned to deal. And besides, maybe they're both home for lunch. I mean, after all it is only 1:00, right? Oh fuckin hell. My car, I totally forgot. Of course they saw it and now are wondering. Or, maybe they're too wrapped up in their own little pathetic lives to pay attention to me. Again, the story of my life. Oh shit. Shit shit shit shit. Here they come. Quick, act asleep. They'll see right through it, but hell, I've got NOTHING to gain.  
"David? Hun, are you up here?" No, no I'm not. Go away. Too bad I can't say that. Oh well, doesn't matter now, here she comes barging right in. Stupid bitch.  
"Way to knock, mom. Way to knock. I'm fine, now if you please, just leave me alone for a bit, I need to think." Okay, that's over with. Now, turn over so that your back is too her. And while you're at it, face that picture of you, Lizzie, and Miranda that you took in one of those stupid booths at the mall. GUILT! Guilt at all corners! Damnit, maybe I'll just leave again for a while. Yeah, I'll just leave. "Never mind mom, I'm going out for a while. I'll be back who knows when."  
"Wait, David. You're father and I have something to tell you." Oh they do, do they? Well, whatever the hell they're planning to do with my miserable life can wait. I don't care about anything else right now than sorting out my fucked up thoughts.  
"Oh? Well, it's just going to have to wait, all right? I'm really not in the mood to hear about your petty selfish differences today, okay mom? Save it for another time." Yes, Gordo. Way to go. Now, all you have to do is storm out the door and turn on your car. Without running into Dad.   
"David, wait. We need to talk." GOD DAMN! Every time I've tried to get away, I'm always bombarded. What the hell is wrong with everyone?   
"No Dad, no we don't. I'm going for a drive. And I'll come back soon, maybe. We'll talk then." Jeezus! Okay, there's the door. Open it, and then run. Run like hell.   
  
Well, here I am again on the open road. Where am I going, you ask? Back to school, like a huge dork. What the fuck am I going to find there? Nothing. Not a damn thing and I know that full well. I'm such a stubborn ass. No one's going to be there. I'm not going to find Lizzie or Miranda and beg for their forgiveness. Wait, I'm not even supposed to be thinking about that. I wish I were dead. Then none of this could happen. Oh good, school. Finally.  
Okay, so here I am, in the quad waiting for something that's not going to happen. Here I am, being Gordo, wishing for the impossible to happen. Look, there's the bench that the three of us would sit on before school. Okay, Gordo. Let's go over there and sit down. It won't bring them back. Yeah, it's still the same brown bench. The bench that we've shared for the past three years now. But not anymore. Wait who is that? There is someone walking over here. Please let it be Miranda or Lizzie please! Oh, no it's not.  
"Hey. Mind if I take the bench?" Wow, her eyes; they were phenomenal. Don't stutter Gordo. You don't even know her name.  
"Uh, sure, I guess. I'm David, well, Gordo. That's what everyone calls me." Way to go. She would've been perfectly happy with David. Oh well.   
"Gordo? Cute. I'm Mel." Mel. Mel my brown-eyed girl. She sat down right next to me. You know that song by The Beatles in their early days? When I Saw Her Standing There? Yeah, well the lyric that says "Well my heart went boom when I crossed that room and I took her hand in mine" pretty much sums up what I'm feeling right now. In fact, it's the first concrete feeling that I've had this entire day.   
"Wait, Gordo as in Lizzie, Miranda and Gordo? The guy with the camcorder? The brain of that little group?" Yes, yes and yes. How'd she know? "How come you aren't with them?"  
"Um, well I guess you could say that we broke up. Heh." I looked at her straight in the eye. There was so much fire, so much passion, they were deep. The deepest eyes I've ever looked through. Then I realized that mine must have been the emptiest and dull eyes she's ever seen. Dammit, Gordo.  
"You did? Wow, I never would have guessed. Good job, I think." She looked away. "Can I ask why?"  
Okay Gordo, here goes. Give her a real, true reason. "I feel like the loner, the outsider. Like they could be so much, but I'm the force that holds them back. And far be it for me to hold them back from whatever they want to do. That, and I'm being taken for granted." Wow, why the fuck couldn't I say that when I actually broke it off? Where the hell was that? Where, I ask you? It was in the back of my mind waiting for the perfect moment, and here it was. God damnit. Wait, her hand, it's patting my knee. What a rush. Gah, I don't even know her. I hate hormones. Okay, should I take her hand? Or should I just leave it there? I don't know. Why isn't this easier for guys?   
"Well, it's a solid reason, but I can tell that you regret it." She was so right. Goddamn women.  
"Uh, hey, Mel, you want to go get a bite, or something? I mean, I've got time. If you want." Wow, way to sound like a 12-year-old there, Gordo. Way to go. Please say yes, please. I feel this connection. I need you, Mel. I know you don't know that, but I do. I'm vulnerable.   
"Okay. You're a cool guy." Yes! Haha, score one for Gordo. Well, okay now she has to get in my car, and we have to go get a bit to eat. What fun this will be.  
  
Just breathe.. 


End file.
